Sunday, April 3, 2011

Hillcrest Lane

She finally had to be taken away.  Distant relatives had arrived and found her and the House in such a state of decay and squalor that their was no other choice but to institutionalize her and place the house for sale in the hopes of getting something out of it…if only a few thousand just for the land.

She had been slowly going insane, inside that old majestic farmhouse, for over a decade since her husband had died.  They said she had spent her days rambling aimlessly about the dark halls of the house.  The neighbors stayed away and the only time people saw her was when she came outside to feed the many stray cats that had taken up residence in the large over grown yard.  After she was gone and the house closed up, still filled with her lifetime… boxed and stacked inside, the house sat silent for six months—until it found me.

The house had been built in 1896 by a German immigrant—one with big dreams and a farmer’s budget.  It had a wrap around porch that had once been grand but had now fallen into sad disrepair.  As it is often in the south, each room of the house opened out onto the porch so that its inhabitants could partake of the night air on those hot and humid Texas evenings.  The whole house was leaning somewhat and looked askew unless you cocked your head.

I needed a home.  I had been given a full ride scholarship to the University of Texas at Austin and was set to start school in September-I just wanted to buy a place and as soon as school was out-- relocate.   I found the house on the Internet and from the moment I saw it I was fascinated with it.   It took some convincing, but I got my realtor to take me to see it.  She was very concerned for me, as the house was in a rural area and away from the hustle and bustle of Austin proper, where I was going to be attending school.  But I would not be swayed –I had to see the house.

We turned down a dirt road, the faded street sign read Hillcrest Lane.  On the left, an expansive meadow and on the right an overgrown  parcel of land… where  you could see this immense Angular roof jutting out of the trees.  It appeared, as if a spacecraft had landed in the trees, as you saw very little of the house itself.  A large tree stood in the front yard--spilt into two halves, one alive and one dead, the victim of a fiery bolt of lightening in a summer thunderstorm.    

When I got out of the car and got closer, I could see vines were growing up the side of the empty house.  As I walked toward the front porch steps, to my left I saw movement and two small kittens (about 8 or 9 weeks old) went running into the brush (one black kitten and one Tuxedo).  I saw this as a good sign, and when I looked down there was an odd object at my feet.  I picked it up and knew instantly what it was-a femur (not human!).  While this would probably freak most people out, I love bones and the femur was one of my favorites for anthropological reasons of course-another good sign. 

The steps were in very bad repair but I managed—my real estate agent would not come in with me.  The front door was lovely under the layers of grime and dirt I could see the etched glass in the door and the 100-year old hardware.  I opened the door and it was like walking into mad confusion.  Bright orange shag carpet covered the hardwood floors, the original 100 year old moldings were all there and there was even a stained glass window-but everything was dirty and covered in years of grime and worn from use.  The house was stuffed with relics- from many different decades. 

As I walked around,  I noticed every cabinet had a nail holding the door shut and there was a band of black grime that was at arm level throughout the house-obviously many years of the same small hand rambling round and round inside this dark sanctuary had left its mark.  The back door was wide open and I made my way into the back yard.  Small plastic bowls and plates littered the ground everywhere and a majestic pecan tree that spiraled up 30 feet into the air was the centerpiece of the yard.  Dark alien looking pecan pods littered the ground below the leaves.  Everything was overgrown and foreboding and I did not want to go very far into unaccompanied. 

I stood there alone and just listened.  I knew I had found my house.  The realtor told me I was crazy and she had some cute little condos near campus for me to look at.  I told her to write up an offer.  I never hesitated.   Of course the offer was accepted … unconditionally. 

When I drove up, after my long trip from Los Angeles with  the U-haul loaded to the brim behind my Jeep, I was so excited.  I opened the door of the house and went in and realized immediately that I was in for some serious work.  It was so bad I knew I could not sleep there till I reclaimed at least one room (I did not want my Cat’s paws to touch the filth so in his carrier he stayed awhile longer). 

I picked the room in the center of the house.  I got to work ripping out the filthy shag carpeting and was rewarded with well –worn,  but beautiful wood floors.  I scrubbed walls and doors and cleaned that one room till my hands were raw.  Finally by midnight,  I had sanitized room with a bed set up, a small table, and an area for my cat J.   Alone in my bed that first night, I realized that this house was different.  As I laid in bed with J curled up on my hip, almost asleep, I was certain I could hear faint music coming from the front of the house.  It was old music… melodies that would have been the rage in the thirties and forties.  I was too tired to do anything and just drifted to sleep—thinking I was just overtired. 

The next night (after another long day of reclaiming tiny parts of this house of squalor) I once again laid down in my bed.  Almost at the instant of sleep, I heard the music again.   This time I made my way to the front room.  I did find an old radio buried in the corner and thought maybe it was coming on-no luck it was no even plugged in.  With nothing else to give me a rational answer I went back to bed. 

Soon asleep, my dreams were vivid .  The same music from before was playing, but louder this time.  It was definitely from the forties and the music was faintly familiar.   I was still in the house, but all the dirt and clutter were gone.  I went into the front parlor and there was a woman probably in her thirties standing by the window looking out at a garden that no longer existed in the present time.  She was swaying with the music and seemed lost in her own revelry.   The furnishings of the house were all old as well and the room had an amber and slightly translucent glow.  When I awoke from the dream I was startled by its intensity.

Night after night the music would play just before I fell asleep.  It was not scary and soon it actually was kind of comforting.  Sometimes,  if I came around the corner just right I thought I could catch a glimpse of the lady at the window.    J would even sit and stare up at the spot quite often.  I began to buy up old big bang and swing records at the Goodwill and play them in the front room.  The house liked it.  The Lady would appear in my dreams several  more times over the three years I lived in the house--always the same scene watching out the window.  I came to really believe that it was just a imprint, an energy loop.  Up until the last night there,  I would hear the faint music as I drifted to sleep.   There were other energies and presences at this property as well and I wish I could say they were all as benign as my lady at the window—especially the Old Man who inhabited my back garage in Texas…but that is another story.

Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Irish Rose

As her cigarette burned down into oblivion and the ice in her glass melted into a watery underworld of stale acerbic hootch, Irish glanced over at the unconscious man in her bed and sighed.  With his wrinkled pants haphazardly wrapped around his ankles and his body torpid in a drunken stupor, she wondered what she was thinking bringing him home from the bar.  He had looked so much better in the smoky daze of last call.

Irish was a beautiful woman.   Even at 38, she still turned heads in the smoky pub where she served up tumblers of viscous hope to irascible customers.  Clad in her short ruffled uniform and with a red pout, compliments of Max Factor, she was as close to 1950’s Hollywood glamor as could be expected in this working class neighborhood in South Philly.  Yet in the harsh light of morning the ravages of too many shots of whiskey chased down with more men than she remembered were etched deep into her face.

"Hey wake-up you lout!"  She screeched out as she kicked the man's feet with her crimson painted toes

She took a swig of whiskey and set the glass down on her vanity.  It was three-thirty in the morning and she knew John would be home soon from his night-shift at the ball bearing plant.

The man rolled onto his side, a loud snore emanating from deep in his throat, and she had the uncomfortable image come to mind of a beached whale left to die on the sand.

Fear began to overtake her.  John, her husband, was a jealous man.

Looking out into the gray haze of the living room, she saw her child John Jr. on the couch, his head deep in a book. He, the only child she could carry to term--the one that had finally stuck in her battered womb after seven miscarriages had ravaged her mind.   Looking out from her perch, a warm glow of amber light surrounded him.  While the sight of this child,  with his symmetrical features, blue eyes, and sandy blond hair, would be one of joy to most mothers to Irish he was sight of remorse.  

The fact that he looked nothing like John Sr. was always an issue and reminded Irish of things she wanted to forget--and the whiskey only helped so much.

John Jr. had long ago gotten accustomed to his mother’s nightly parade of men through their cramped apartment-in fact he had never known any different.  What he feared more than the strangers passing through was his mother’s unpredictable rages.  Irish was a woman who showed only the extremes of emotion and was flat-line the rest of the time.  She either loved you passionately or hated with you an equal intensity.

It was during the dark hours of her whiskey-fueled anger that John Jr. had suffered the most.

This night was not the first time that John Jr. would help his mother get rid of a lover in the wee small hours of the morning, but it would be the last.

With John Jr.’s help, Irish got the bloated man dressed and out of the apartment before John Sr. got home. The piercing screech of her beloved parakeets echoed through young John’s mind as they fumbled and dragged the man beyond the confines of the apartment.

John Jr. would come to violently hate the sight and sound of caged birds for the rest of his life.

Night Flight

Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Workday

Silence is shattered at dawn.
Slim fingers of red reach across the dark sky-
Metal beasts rumble loudly on their way.
Small chirps make a chorus of angry horns
Overshadowed by a siren which deafens in the midst.
Tucked away in warmth… I wonder
At the motion that lay before the threshold
So mindless in its ferocity.
Do they know of the small spaces of wonder in the labyrinth?

Lamppost at First Light